Friday, February 13, 2015

Hollywood Obscenities

GOOD EVENING FOLKS.
I WAS JUST READING AN ARTICLE THAT TOLD ABOUT TOM CRUISE, AKA "THE MIDGET SAMURAI" ENDEAVORING TO SELL HIS TELLURIDE, COLO HOME FOR (JUST A SECOND WHILE I TAKE A ROLAID)..

AH THATS BETTER.

TO CONTINUE; SHORT STUFF WANTS TO SELL HIS HOME, SITUATED IN THE WOODS NEAR TELLURIDE, COLO  FOR  THE PALTRY PRICE OF $ 59 MILLION DOLLARS.

SAY WHAT?

IT'S TRUE FOLKS, THE COUCH JUMPER IS RELUCTANTLY SELLING THIS 4 BEDROOM 6 BATH HOME FOR MORE MONEY THAT MOST AMERICANS WOULD MAKE IN TEN LIFETIMES.

A LOCAL CITIZEN, KNOWN AS CRAZY HARRY ALLOWED, DURING AN INTERVIEW WITH A JOURNALIST, SAID, AND I QUOTE; "I HEARD THAT THAT LITTLE FELLER HAD THE HOUSE BUILT AND HE AND SOME WOMAN COME AND LOOKED AT THE HOUSE, SPENT ONE NIGHT THERE, HEARD SOME NOISES IN THE NIGHT, DECIDED TO TAKE THEIR COLLECTIONS OF SUNGASSES AND ELEVATOR SHOES AND GO BACK TO WHERE THEY COULD HEAR SOME GOOD OLD FASHIONED TRAFFIC NOISE.

BESIDE WHICH, CRAZY HARRY SAID HE RAN INTO CRUISE WHEN THE  LITTLE FELLER "COME UP T' ME AND ASKED ME WHERE HE COULD GET A CAP OF CHINEO, OR SOMETHIN LIKE THAT" "WHEN I ASKED HIM WHERE HE WAS FROM, AND HE LOOKED AT ME LIKE A WAS CRAZY AND ASKED ME IF I DIDN'T KNOW WHO HE WAS, AND WELL SIR, I LOOKED DOWN AT HIM AND ASKED HIM IF HE WAS A STUDENT AT THE LOCAL GRADE SCHOOL. "FOR SOME REASON OR OTHER, HE GOT ALL RED IN THE FACE AND JUMPED INTO HIS CAR, CLIMBED IN HIS CAR SEAT AND TOLD THE NICE TALL LADY WHO WAS DRIVIN TO 'GET ME OUT OF HERE, THESE YOKELS DON'T KNOW WHO I AM'. WELL COURSE I KNEW WHO HE WAS. HE WAS THAT JACKASS THAT HAD THAT BIG HOUSE BUILT, DIDN'T PAY THE CONTRACTOR ALL HE OWED, AND PUT IT UP FOR SALE FOR ENOUGH MONEY TO IMPRESS ANYBODY WHO'S FOOL ENOUGH TO COME LOOK AT THE HOUSE AND WONDER WHERE THE REST OF IT IS!

IT'S ENOUGH TO MAKE A SANE PERSON (WHO LETS OUT MOST OF THE FOLKS  IN HOLLYWOOD.) LAUGH

STAY WELL p.s. I should elaborate. I DO NOT have anything against shorter people, Just this overpaid moron Cruise.

TOP

No comments: